Divorce

Divorce Debunked – Restraining Orders

April 20, 2020 // by Sean Ramirez

Going through a divorce is stressful for both spouses and any children involved. If domestic violence or sexual abuse is in the picture – for you or for any of your children – the circumstances of a divorce can become downright dangerous

In cases with real danger, utilizing legal tools, such as restraining orders, to protect yourself or your family members is absolutely legitimate.

However…

However, many people have a serious misunderstanding of the role of restraining orders. They may have received (bad) advice from friends and family members that they should file restraining orders to ensure that they retain child custody or even possession of the marital residence. Such advice is not only unhelpful, but can ultimately be very detrimental to your case.

Judges are very savvy about legal maneuvers and attempts to manipulate the court. Needless to say, if you’re caught attempting to pull a stunt like filing a frivolous restraining order, not only will your petition almost certainly be rejected, but the incident could possibly taint the entire course of your divorce proceedings.

If you have legitimate concerns about child custody or whether your spouse is attempting to conceal marital assets, there are legal procedures already in place. Resorting to what is essentially a frivolous restraining order is not necessary.

Worse, unnecessary restraining orders are a drain on the finances of the person against whom the order is filed. If you hate your spouse and want to see him or her “punished,” this may sound like just what the doctor ordered. However, in the long term, the only parties who truly benefit from unnecessary restraining orders are the attorneys who collect hefty legal fees for filing restraining order petitions on behalf of their clients. Think of it this way, if you’re expecting spousal support or child support from your ex after a divorce, it’s more likely you’ll actually receive it if your spouse is financially solvent.

And if you need the advice of an attorney for a divorce, give us a call at (505) 830-6563!

Divorce Debunked – Assets

April 20, 2020 // by Sean Ramirez

Going through a divorce can be heart wrenching. Along with the trauma of dealing with who has custody of the children, there is often a lot of drama around who gets to keep what. Movies like War of the Roses, where a couple battles literally to their mutual death over their house, may be exaggerated, but the basic premise is sound. People get really wound up over their stuff, and often resort to extreme measures to get what they want, or at least keep the other spouse from getting the car, the house, valuable artwork, etc.

One bad piece of advice that gets circulated a lot is that concealing assets is a good divorce strategy. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Especially in a state like New Mexico, which is a community property state, attempting to conceal assets from your soon-to-be-ex spouse is a very bad idea. Not only is it likely to be an unsuccessful attempt, but once the judge discovers what you’re up to, your case will be poisoned in his or her eyes. That’s a headache you do not need. Maybe you’re too clever to blatantly hide assets. Instead, you have the bright idea that you will “sell” a coveted possession to a friend or loved one for a fraction of its value, with the understanding that you’ll “buy” it back once the divorce is final. Try to resist the temptation. Not only is this tactic seldom more effective than outright hiding assets, in many cases it isn’t necessary to resort to such extremes.

There are measures in place to protect personal assets to which you have a legitimate right to keep separate from your soon-to-be-ex spouse. Examples of property that generally don’t fall under the community property category include property obtained before the marriage, an inheritance that you receive individually, even after the marriage and a gift from a third party made specifically to you. There may be other measures you can take to protect personal property that adhere to the law – the secret is getting the advice of a competent attorney.